New Perspective On Shit

April: i also get bummed that batman isn’t real
April: like, why am i getting MORE into batman the older i get?!
Millie: hahahaha
Millie: i hear you
Millie: i’m pissed that Dave TV from the david lee roth “california girls” video isn’t real and i can’t get a job there
April: hahahaha
Millie: but listen
Millie: batman’s kind of an asshole.
April: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: just like, personality wise
Millie: i mean he does great stuff
April: see, i just think he is NO NONSENSE
April: he takes no shit.
Millie: but he’s just kind of an asshole
April: do you mean batman or bruce wayne?
Millie: batman!
April: i just think he doesn’t have time for your shit
April: that’s his thing
Millie: i just imagine if like, i got rescued by batman
Millie: i’d be like “ack, thanks…”
April: he’s all business
April: he’ll rescue you, but he’s not trying to HANG
Millie: zero bedside manner
April: i agree, but i’m fine with that
April: leave that shit to superman
April: batman is like a fucking ninja
April: in and out, silent, cover of night
April: no pomp and/or circumstance
Millie: i think batman does night shit
Millie: like i think batman does like the nighttime party scene stuff
Millie: like superman will totally fix train crashes and shit
April: superman wants to be on a float in a small-town parade, getting accolades
April: batman is grimy
Millie: but batman might come get you if you had too much to drink and now you’re getting mugged
Millie: i mean, maybe that’s why he’s an asshole?
April: i don’t get asshole from that!
April: i get FOCUSED
Millie: just b/c he has to deal with people who might have initially made a bad decision
April: he’s not like, being MEAN
April: he’s just like, getting shit done
Millie: he’s like, “ugh. i have you pick you up from the club AGAIN?”
April: i mean, MAYBE an eye roll
Millie: look, i’m trying to understand his assholeness
April: maybe he’s rolling his eyes like, “stop hanging out in these shady alleys, people”
Millie: but i def think he’s, at best, kinda brusque
April: oh sure
April: he’s terse
Millie: right that’s what i mean
April: but he ain’t got time to CHAT
Millie: superman does all the daytime, gee golly gosh stuff
April: he’s gotta get to his cave and make new weapons
April: right!
Millie: batman is having to deal with street trash
Millie: he’s totally downtown
April: and has his built-in powers
April: batman’s gotta WORK
April: and make shit
April: and like, repair the bullet holes in his suit or whatever
Millie: still dude. maybe not always be frowning when you’re saving people
Millie: i get it’s thankless work but man
April: hahahahahaha
Millie: he’s acts like an overworked/underpaid social worker
April: i feel like the ACT OF SAVING is enough
April: that’s nice enough for me
Millie: just like “UGH. I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.”
Millie: don’t get me wrong — i’m really down for batman saving people and all that
April: he should do it with a smile? hahaha
Millie: but sometimes i feel like it comes at a price
Millie: he will judge you and make you feel like shit for your choices
April: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: and roll his eyes
April: “batman is really disappointed in me. i should curb my partying.”
Millie: i don’t need the judgments, batman.
April: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
April: just save me and let me live my life