New Perspective On Shit

April: okay
April: in the o.g. “mother” video
April: danzig is hot as fuck
April: he’s like a SEXY WOLFMAN
Millie: i’m saying
Millie: like first album era danzig is my TIGER BEAT CRUSH
April: HAHAHAHA
April: i love how he’s NEVER NOT IN A MUSCLE-T
April: holler at this ’80s MOM HOT CHICK: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qC-W0_cv85E
Millie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA god that’s a mom’s ass
April: HAHA TOTALLY
Millie: this song RULES
April: oh totally
April: it’s like DIRTY BLUES
April: but this woman! hahahahaha
April: she’s like one of the BANGER SISTERS
April: i do love that he reps for black chicks in this, though
Millie: okay, i need to share with you like the biggest SONG BONER for me
Millie: okay, in this song
Millie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G5kadfu4Cwg
Millie: when the tempo changes at like :34 seconds in
Millie: that seriously gives me a raging boner.
Millie: from hell.
April: YEAH MAN
April: these are jams
April: i love that he’s all into the devil and shit, but these have melodies
April: it’s not like KROKUS or some shit
Millie: yeah, to me this isn’t even heavy metal really
Millie: it just sounds like death rock or something
Millie: wait, is that real genre?
April: i dunno
Millie: haha what do you call heavy rock w/ an elvis impersonator
April: i feel like jack white really tries to bite this guy’s steez
April: HAHAHAHA
April: yeah, where’s the section at media play for bluesy death rock with a beefy wolfman elvis impersonator?
Millie: HAHAHA media play
Millie: okay listen — here’s truth
Millie: the misfits are seriously the world’s most perfect band
April: hahahahaha
Millie: and here’s why
Millie: punk rock + classic movie references + devilock
Millie: oh and baby eating
April: plus ELVIS shit?! best.
April: like i was watching this interview with danzig last night
April: and first the guy was like, “what made you want to start the misfits?” and he goes, “because i hate everybody.”
Millie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: god, what a GENIUS
April: and then he asked about his influences, and he was like, “at the time everyone was into journey and styx and that bullshit, and i liked comics and horror movies and elvis.”
Millie: see? keepin’ it simple. the finer things in life.
April: HAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: that’s what i seriously love about them
April: only the finest ingredients
Millie: also, what’s so great about them is that you CAN’T BE INTELLIGENT about them
Millie: it’s just like, you can’t intellectualize them at all
Millie: their songs are LITERALLY about aliens eating brains and raping moms
Millie: they are songs written by and for 15-year-old boys
April: i just love that it seriously seems like he based his whole look on what would have happened if elvis became a beefy wolfman.
Millie: it’s like when you’re in high school and you hate everyone and you say to yourself, “i wish a martian would rape that guy’s face”
Millie: well they WROTE A SONG about it and put it on an album
April: “wanna hear a song about it? here it goes”
Millie: the most unsophisticated shit ever
Millie: I LOVE IT
April: hahahaha
April: i feel like danzig narrowly escaped guidoism
April: lucky for him he was into dark shit
Millie: see, i feel like danzig should have SET THE STANDARD for guidoism
Millie: they should have taken his lead
April: i feel like there’s a fork in the road for dudes from new jersey
April: you go right, you’re on “jersey shore.” you go left, you’re in the misfits
Millie: like if only jersey-ass italian dudes were into metal and comics, i could respect it
April: well, right
April: although i feel like danzig puts on a bit of a fakey southern drawl?
April: but maybe that’s the elvis thing
Millie: yeah, his guidoism is more refined
April: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: because he doesn’t appear to be into cars
April: man, i wish he wasn’t two feet tall
April: as tall as he is wide
Millie: i think i make certain concessions
Millie: i gotta say
Millie: i feel like every woman i know would do him
April: i feel like danzig has three hobbies, really: 1. the devil, 2. fucking, and 3. lifting weights
Millie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: sometimes together
April: HAHAHAHAHAHA
April: sometimes he combines his interests
Millie: blasting delts
April: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA
April: he goes to the gym to GNAR HIS QUADS
April: or whatever
Millie: i really don’t think there was a finer specimen of human than ‘88 danzig
April: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
April: dude was 100% PURE BEEF
Millie: he wasn’t like INSANELY ripped yet
Millie: tuff cuffs
Millie: best hair period
April: yeah, but he was ALL STOCK
Millie: http://www.worldmovesfast.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/danzig_lineup_1988.jpg
Millie: finest era PERIOD.
April: yeah man
April: look at those GLOSSY LOCKS
April: like SHINY WOLFMAN HAIR
April: i dunno man
April: the beginning of the misfits was hot too
April: like short hair in back but devilock
Millie: oh TOTALLY
Millie: i mean, when he was wearing lace shirts and shit
April: http://djdesign.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/misfits.jpg
Millie: look at this: http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y231/raysha/GlennDanzigMisfits.jpg
April: oh yeah, that’s like the farrah fawcett poster-type shit
Millie: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Millie: this is our farrah fawcett poster
April: http://dyn.ifilm.com/resize/image/blog//1/3/8/7/1387323/200902/1235078100073.jpg
April: http://becomingpros.files.wordpress.com/2009/03/misfits-1.jpg
Millie: damn man.
Millie: you know what depresses the shit out of me?
Millie: the fact that jerry only kept that shit going and LAMED IT OUT
April: uh, YEAH
April: SUPER LAME
Millie: when they hot topic-ized themselves
April: especially because danzig WAS the misfits
April: like came up with EVERYTHING
April: wrote ALL THE SHIT
Millie: yeah and they hate each other and released their own versions of shit
April: jerry only is such a DAD now
April: i watched an interview with him last night too
April: it was like watching my dad in misfits getup
Millie: man, i gotta say, when i saw danzig like five or so years ago
Millie: it was like watching someone’s dad in a fishnet shirt
April: oh man.
Millie: and he’s actually my dad’s age
April: but i mean, jerry only was talking super nerdy
April: like he SOUNDED dad-like
April: had a dad-like demeanor
April: like at least danzig still reps evil and hating everything and shit
Millie: HAHAHAHAHAHA
April: jerry only was like, “hey guys, want some sunny d?” but in misfits makeup
Millie: he’s not pressure-washing the side of the house on the weekends, you mean
April: HAHAHA exactly